2007-10-22 - 2:07 a.m.
People really are far too mean, that’s the thing. Just today, I was working in the library, and this mean old woman came up to me and snarled, “There are dogs in the library! They shouldn’t have dogs in the library!”
I turned around and looked at her. She had shortish grey hair and brittle face etched with grim frown lines. Her nose was beaky, like a crows, and she had a fish’s grey eyes.
“A dog? In the library? Surely not, madame,” I replied.
The woman’s voice rose in a shriek. “A dog! It was a big, shaggy beast! A filthy verminous creature, all fur and fangs! If it attacked some old lady, can you imagine the law suit? There should be no dogs here!”
I really did not know what to think of all this, for, yes, dogs are strictly forbidden at the library. And there is no one who would dare to break such a rule, for even if he or she did, the library cops would descend on them and escort the offending pooch off the premises post haste.
Later on, I found myself walking through the library lobby, and SHAZAM! There it was, a gigantic dog, being led on a leash by a pleasant-faced middle aged woman. The mean old woman was right! There was a hound at the library. But the thing is, the dog was wearing a uniform – a gigantic badge-jacket thing, wrapped around its midsection, identifying the beast as being a Seeing Eye Dog in Training.
You see, as I suddenly realized, Seeing Eye dogs are actually a frequent sight at the library. The teachers at the Seeing Eye Dog school often bring their students to the library so the dogs can get used to being around humans without being distracted. And it is perfectly legal. Thus, the mean old woman from before was not far wrong: The library did allow dogs, albeit Seeing Eye Dogs. And the woman was a mean old thing for trying to ban them.
Meanwhile, I have a question of etiquette to ask you. At the library, from time to time, I see a rather handsome gentleman – oh, he’s about 39 or so, I’d say, tall and thin, with handsome Irish brunette hair and a little D’Artagnan patch under his lip. He’s really very sexy, and he sometimes wears a business suit – and sometimes he wears lovely tight blue jeans that caress his bubble butt just so. Very sexy.
I’ve seen his photo on gay.com for like forever. And, yes, because he has one vaguely adult photo of his dick, I have seen him naked as well, in a fashion. Because he puts up ads regularly on Craigslist, I am aware that he is into being sucked off by young, thin Asian boys – none of which I am. But, and here is my question to you. Is there an etiquette about approaching this fellow? I have a feeling that Emily Post does not have an answer for this sort of thing. And even if there was an answer, it is quite obvious that I am not what he is looking for. Maybe I would have been about 20 years ago. But now I am old!
And yet, every day he shows up at the Computer Commons to post his Craigslist hook up ad and to check the results. And he seems handsome enough to manage to arrange the hook up within the hour he is allotted as computer time by the City of Santa Monica. I have thought of offering him more than the maximum amount of computer time as a special gift – but I imagine that he would be bewildered and would consider it far too forward. So who knows what I should do? Your suggests are welcome, though try to refrain from making lame ones like “ohh you should just tell him what you think!” What? Do you think this is high school again? Give me a break.
